El Mal De Ojo!

Shhhh, I don't want to tempt El Mal De Ojo (The Evil Eye) but Sofia slept through the night last night.....from 8:00 pm until 6:45 AM.

The night before she slept from 7:30 pm-3:30 PM and only took 3 oz and then slept until 6:45 AM.

The trick-only offer room temperature formula.

We don't think this is going to last very long. She's been on a formula strike. I don't blame her, really. She's been drinking warm breastmilk from the tap for the past 7 months and now she's having to drink formula from a bottle.

I hate that we have to wean. It's really breaking my heart to the point of tears, but I have to get back on my MS therapy. I know the best thing for her is a healthy mom, but I hate paying $$ for formula when we had such a wonderful and easy breastfeeding relationship.

I miss the closeness. I love when I nurse her and she take the arm that's underneath and rubs my side and then she takes the arm on top and either rubs my face or plays with my necklace. Now the bottle is in the way-though it doesn't stop her from trying to rub my face.

Anyway, we are weaning her so that I can get on Betaseron, and every other day injection. I'll probably be starting it in the next 2 weeks-as soon as a BETA nurse can come out and help me with my first injection.

Poor Sofia is just not loving formula. If I can get 24 oz in her during a day we're lucky and now she's even refusing solids. I know it's just a phase and hopefully soon she'll start taking both again. Luckily for her she's got some extra fat reserves. :)

Well, this post took on a totally different direction than I was planning, but I guess I needed to talk about it. Mothering is hard. Mothering with MS is even harder. It's hard making decisions like this. I know it's the best thing for us all, but since I became a mother I've totally changed the way I think. I do everything for my children. Every decision I make is for their benefit. It feels almost selfish to put myself first. And while logically I know that getting on my MS therapy is the right thing for both me and my family. I feel like I'm short changing Sofia.

Life is Like A Box Of Chocolates...

I want to apologize for not updating the blog at all this last week. It's been a rough 14 days around here.

On Sunday, February 3rd, while taking a shower, I noticed that the left side of my torso felt weird, almost like my skin was super thick, yet at the same time ultra-sensitive to the touch. I didn't think much of it, but did mention it to Ricardo.

By Monday morning, that sensation had spread from my torso down my left leg to my knee, by Tuesday it was all the way to the bottom of my left foot, and by Thursday the sensation has intensified so deeply that in certain areas it felt as if my skin was burning off and other areas were so sensitive that just the brushing of my clothing was painful...

We acted fast and I got in to my Neurologist right away. He scheduled an MRI of my thoracic and cervical spine as he felt that most MS exacerbations that are felt below the ribcage are actually caused by lesions in the spine, not the brain.

The MRI did come back positive for a brand new, shiny lesion in the T5 zone, which just confirmed that I am indeed experiencing a new exacerbation.

What does this mean? Well, I guess it just means the disease is progressing. Not only do I have lesions in my brain, but they are now occurring in my spinal region as well.

Ok, but what does this mean? Honestly, I don't know. It means that we can't keep digging our heads in the sand and pretending that I was misdiagnosed. It means I need to start actively researching and getting back on therapy. But what it means for my short-term and long-term future. Who knows? Maybe I'll get lucky and go another 5 years without another exacerbation, maybe even longer...but maybe not.

Anyway, I am still experiencing the pins & needles and burning in my left side of my body. I am currently on prednisone (steroids) to help shorten the length and intensity of the exacerbation. I've been told this can last anywhere from 2 to 4 months.

But I'm ok. I'm not in any real physical pain. I’m just worried and emotional and a little sad...but I have an incredible family, and every day with them makes me realize how lucky I am to be living this life.

I hate to be such a downer in this wonderful family blog, but I figured this was something that is impacting our family right now, so it was important to share with you all.

But, I promise, tomorrow I'll be back to post a ton of pictures from the past 8 days (two dinner parties, snow, and a V-Day playdate)

Oh, because I have to....

It's MS WALK time and it's so very important to me that we do everything we can to raise money for the cause. Please, if you have any spare cash (even $1), please donate.

http://www.nationalmssociety.org/site/TR/Walk/NJBWalkEvents?pg=personal&fr_id=8413&fr_id=8413&px=2725611


I hope all is well with you and yours.